1. Donate Sperm: I am sure as hell not donating an egg, so I have decided that I will donate sperm. This one takes some pre-planning. First I will need to get intimate with someone, collect their sperm and set a memory reversal charm on them (also known as a bludgeon to the head/neck area)
Next, I'm going to have to dress up as a man and travel to the nearest sperm bank. Upon entry to the room filled deeply with nasty porno used by many men before, I will dump the sperm into the provided vial and walk out. The look upon my face will match the look I would imagine most men have when leaving the sperm filled masturbational porn room. The: "I am probably going to regret this sperm donation post marriage, however I've got a party to get to and beer to buy". I'm not sure exactly what this look comes across as or how to achieve it, but I'm prepared to do some research.
2. Sell tea as weed: I'll show up on a school premise sporting a shady looking over coat with MANY pockets. I would probably not bathe for a few days before to obtain the true stench of a drug dealer. Skirting near the edges of the school, I will make my attack on the nearest group of high schoolers that are throwing me the "I want to piss my parents off" look.
I'll sidle up, looking rather svelte, while I ask in a husky voice if they'd like to buy some spliff, some Mary Jane or I might use the phrase "Some of the good stuff". Around this time I'll pull open my jacket revealing my vast array of pockets containing many varieties of green tea smashed into small bags. Obviously I'll tell them that the weed in the top pockets is of the highest quality, and the stuff on the bottom is low quality. Knowing these kids, they'll pick the high quality stuff. Once I've sold about 10 bags of tea for $30 each, I'll thank them for doing business and bid them farewell, while I walk casually away..that is until I break into a full on run and never look back.
Actually, that's all my money making ways I have for now..
Perhaps I'll just have to suck it up and get a real job, because I don't think I'll cut it as a man or as a drug dealer.